All Things Legal - Experts and Resources

Preparing Your Home to Make the Best Impression with the Child Custody Evaluator

Posted to by Diana Mercer on Tue, 02/23/2010 - 9:14am

Before the evaluator comes to visit, parents should do a safety check and make necessary adjustments. The home does not have to be spotless, but sheets should be on the beds. Odors from cigarettes, trash, pets, and diapers should be minimized.

• A wide variety of fresh and healthy food should be in the refrigerator and cupboards. Everyone who lives in the home should be present for the interview.

•Anyone who is a frequent visitor to the home may be there at the beginning but should also be prepared to leave approximately ten minutes after the evaluator's arrival.

•The television should be turned off as soon as the evaluator arrives.

•The evaluator should not be offered anything but a glass of water.

•Let the evaluator choose where to sit and where to talk to household members individually and as a group.

• Inform the evaluator in advance if a household member needs to be seen first because of a work or school commitment.

read more >>

Elizabeth Edwards and the Toll of Infidelity

Posted to by Jill Brooke on Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:03am

Maybe because I deal with a lot of divorced women who have had their hearts sautéed in a frying pan as a result of infidelity and disappointment, I am not surprised that Elizabeth Edwards could be both Saint Elizabeth and Lady Macbeth.

Some women are just driven to it. I am not making an excuse for her behavior, but I do understand it.

For me, the telling heartbreaking detail was what she said to one of her husband’s staffers after living in a bubble of denial for so long about her husband’s mistress Rielle Hunter and then having her illusions popped so publically. (Babies will do that). As reported in the book, “Game Change,” she desperately cried out, “I have to believe it. Because if I don’t, it means I’m married to a monster.”

The guy she married had indeed morphed into an unrecognizable, egotistical monster. But he was still the father of her children.

read more >>

Legal Separation or Trial Separation?

9 Key Issues to Consider

Posted to by Cathy Meyer on Sun, 01/24/2010 - 7:24am

In my last article, I discussed legal separation and the benefits to a couple that feel they need time away from a marriage. I strongly suggest anyone making the decision to live separately protect herself legally.

If it all seems overwhelming and that word “legal” is too much to handle, you do have the option of trying a simple, trial separation. A trial separation allows you to experience time away from the marriage without making any final decisions or legal steps toward divorce. That, of course, makes it easier to reverse than a legal separation.

A trial separation is an informal arrangement that you come to with your husband. You work out the guidelines and come to an agreement that you both can live with. There need to be ground rules and you need to understand that if those rules aren’t followed, you have no legal recourse against your husband. Below is a list of issues you will want to think about as part of an informal trial separation agreement:

read more >>

The Difference Between Legal Separation and Divorce

Posted to by Cathy Meyer on Sun, 01/17/2010 - 10:02am

A legal separation and divorce are more similar than different. In fact, except for a few key points they are almost the same. The difference is in the legal standard one must meet to obtain a legal separation or divorce and the relief you get from either. Even then, the difference only has to do with whether or not the marriage continues.

All states have legal standards a couple has to meet in order to divorce. You have your no-fault states in which anyone can divorce, reason or no reason. Then you have New York State, which still requires grounds for divorce.

In the end, a divorce simply means that the state you live in recognizes that your marriage is broken and can’t be fixed.

A court can grant a legal separation if “irreconcilable differences between the parties have caused a temporary or unlimited breakdown of the marriage.” A legal separation suspends the marriage whereas a divorce ends the marriage.

The relief offered by a legal separation or a divorce is, again, quite similar and in some situations exactly the same. In cases of legal separation and divorce, most state courts can make provisions for:

read more >>

Legal Separation: The Alternative You're Looking For?

Posted to by Cathy Meyer on Wed, 12/30/2009 - 12:14am

Do you need a break from marital conflict, but you’re not ready to take the next step for divorce? If so, legal separation will give you the break you need, and protection while you take time away to figure out your next step.

During a legal separation, a couple will negotiate a temporary agreement and file it with the courts. This means that during the time you are living apart such issues as child custody, spousal support, visitation and the division of marital assets and debts are legally protected.

Be aware though that whatever you agree to during a legal separation may set a precedence that will carry over should you and your husband eventually decide to divorce. You should be as concerned with your long-term needs when negotiating a legal separation agreement as you would be if you were negotiating a divorce settlement agreement.

read more >>

The Pros & Cons of Selling the Marital Home

Debbie Does Divorce with Janell Weinstein

Posted to by Debbie Nigro on Mon, 12/28/2009 - 7:22am

Is that cozy breakfast nook harder to part with than your ex? Maybe so, but there are key factors to consider when deciding whether to keep or sell the marital home. Debbie gets the scoop from legal expert Janell Weinstein.

read more >>

Pro Se FAQ, Resources, and Tips

Part 6 of a 6-part series

Posted to by Cathy Meyer on Mon, 12/07/2009 - 9:08am

For the past five weeks I’ve been talking about pro se divorce — how you can represent yourself in a divorce action. Here are some frequently asked questions: 

1. Can I handle a pro se divorce?

People who are in the best situation to proceed successfully are those:

• Who know where their spouse is;
• Whose children are not involved;
• Who have divided whatever property or money they have to mutual satisfaction;
• Who do not want any monetary settlement from each other; and,
• Who have settled most of the otherwise disruptive emotional issues between them so they can cooperate.

2. Is it possible to go pro se if I have children?

It is possible to handle issues such as child custody, support, and visitation as a pro se litigant. But anyone with children should at least consult with an attorney before coming to a final agreement on these issues. Having an attorney look over your agreement will protect you now and down the road.

3. What if my spouse moved out of state?

read more >>