Experts and Resources

Divorce can be overwhelming, confusing, emotionally wrought and downright terrifying, with so much to consider and too much to do. We know having the right information at the right time is critical to you, so we've organized all of our resource content into a simple directory to the left to provide you quick, easy access to all the tools you need to make informed and powerful choices.

Budgeting Basics For Life After Divorce

Essential tips for creating a budget and trimming expenses post divorce

Posted to by Rachel Small on Fri, 09/02/2011 - 4:01am

Financial experts suggest that the biggest economic burden from divorce falls on women and children. On average, after a divorce they suffer a 45% reduction in standard of living.

At this time of great emotional pain, making ends meet becomes a daunting task. I've put together a few strategies for money management and living within a budget for all the women out there facing the post-divorce financial crunch.

Changing your lifestyle isn't easy, but if you keep these tips in mind, you can survive post-divorce financial troubles. Don't let yourself and your family become part of the rising debt statistics — manage your money wisely.

Create a Budget:

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Can An Ex Modify An Alimony Agreement?

4 key facts you should know about alimony agreements

Posted to by Rachel Small on Wed, 09/01/2010 - 12:45pm

First Wives World received an inquiry from a reader who we’ll call “Paula” asking for help with her alimony dilemma. Her issues may apply to many of our readers, so as a non-practicing attorney and now a FWW blogger, I thought I’d offer some guidance.

The background: Paula’s husband left the marriage for a younger woman and asked for a divorce. She was served with divorce papers which didn’t provide for any support even though she had just been downsized out of her job and was living on unemployment compensation.

Paula asked her ex for some support and both agreed on a sum. But when her ex asked for how long, she said, “a few years.” First red flag: Her response wasn’t specific enough but her ex had his attorney revise the divorce papers to include alimony.

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5 Tips to Successful Independence After Divorce

Why you need to learn to say NO more often

Posted to by Naomi Dunne on Wed, 09/01/2010 - 10:09am

If you're anything like every other working divorced mother on the planet, you have too much on your plate.

You also have a really, really hard time saying no.

For a while after a divorce, when we have nothing better to do or we're trying to make friends or build our career, being asked to do things for other people makes us feel needed and wanted. It's wonderful to feel like you're an important part of other people's lives. Eventually, though, it gets tiring. Eventually, you've said yes too many times, leaving you focussed on anything but regaining control of your life after your divorce.

Eventually, you need to stop.

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Post Divorce Dating Rules

Should You Lend Your Boyfriend Money?

Posted to by Maryann Kelly on Tue, 08/31/2010 - 6:21pm

I wish I didn't have to give this speech. In fact, I wish I could just state the obvious that money and romance don't mix well. Sexual intimacy creates a vulnerable enviroment that prohibits rational thought.

In fact, that's kind of my favorite part of a new romance.The mutual willingness to suspend reality and remain light and playful. It's a time to dream and be reminded that all things are possible. Financial investment requires rational thought and a complete understanding of the risks. Not that I discourage risk- taking, but you're not rational when you're under the spell of sexual bliss.

So, should you lend your boyfriend money for his business?

Okay, it's so obvious that you're all screaming "no"! But let me set it up for you. It's a year after your divorce, you've lost some weight and bought some new clothes. The kids are in school full-time and doing well. You go out to a party and meet a nice guy who takes you out and you're inseparable for six months.

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Your Final Divorce Decree Date May Affect Your Year End Taxes

Tips from a tax attorney on joint filing or filing separately

Posted to by Rachel Small on Mon, 08/30/2010 - 6:00am

First Wives World readers going through a split may find information from a tax attorney who specializes in divorce very helpful. Her tips, detailing how divorce can affect your income tax, appeared in the (Lancaster, Pa.) Intelligencer Journal.

Keep in mind that each year, December 31 is "D Day," or the date determining your marital status for income tax purposes. If by December 31 you have a final divorce decree, you can file as "single" or as "head of household."

If your divorce isn't final by the last day of December, you may continue to file jointly or married, filing separately. Joint filing will result in lower taxes but there's a downside, because you remain liable for your spouse's taxes if he/she doesn't pay. IRS rules are a bit complicated but we'll try to simplify them here:

For head of household, there are three requirements:

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The Effects Of Divorce on Adult Children

an exclusive series of articles written by children of divorce

Posted to by First Wives World on Sun, 08/29/2010 - 4:04am

Now that you’re “Divorced with Kids” instead of “Married with Children”, do you find yourself blaming your divorce for every little quirk in your kid's personality? More importantly, does your kid?

If you could climb into a time machine and travel to the future to find out from your kids just how much you think the divorce might have SCREWED them up, would you do it?

Well, while we don't have a time machine, here’s what we can offer: A panel of grown kids who—GASP—actually survived their parents’ divorce to provide us with a unique brand of expert insight on divorce: What helped them, what could have been better, and what just “totally sucked”.

Strap yourselves in and join Alyssa, A.J., Antonio, Vanessa, and Justin as they journey back to their parents’ divorces. Perhaps you'll see your life (and your kids) reflected in theirs. Or perhaps you'll just see a glimmer of hope through our small portal to the future.

From Children of Divorce:

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Selling The Marital Home

It was a roller coaster ride

Posted to by Cathy Meyer on Fri, 08/27/2010 - 5:15pm

In my last post, I mentioned that the legal aspects of my divorce had lingered, for lack of a better word, for seven years. I think First Wives World readers will have a better understanding of the obstacles I faced during those years with some background information.

Here's the thing: I wasn't the one who pursued the divorce. My ex- husband made that decision. Once he had made the decision, there was a paradigm shift in his brain and the man began to live in a parallel universe — one in which there is rational thought.

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