Experts and Resources

Divorce can be overwhelming, confusing, emotionally wrought and downright terrifying, with so much to consider and too much to do. We know having the right information at the right time is critical to you, so we've organized all of our resource content into a simple directory to provide you quick, easy access to all the tools you need to make informed and powerful choices.

Choose a category relevant to you: getting a divorce, your finances and divorce, kids family and divorce, sex and dating post-divorce, mind and spirit, health and body through divorce, career and pursuits post-divorce.

Selfishness: A Quality To Cultivate

Part 1 of 2

Posted to by Cathy Meyer on Sun, 02/07/2010 - 8:34am

My college boyfriend gave me a collection of books written by Ayn Rand. One of the books was titled The Virtues of Selfishness. I remember shuddering when I read the title. I wondered to myself how there could be any virtue at all in selfishness. Why would I want to read a book about disregarding the well-being of others in favor of my own well-being?

In my mind, a selfish person was someone who took care of herself first, be damned what that meant to others. A lout who is oblivious to the needs of others and the negative consequences of her "selfishness." Nah, I had no use for a book that thought someone of that character was virtuous in anyway.

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Staying Motivated

Episode 8 of Kathy Kaehler's vlog

Posted to by Kathy Kaehler on Fri, 02/05/2010 - 2:11pm

Maintaining healthy eating habits and exercise can be so hard especially when you're going through a divorce. But Kathy encourages you to stick with it and offers three tips for doing just that: Put yourself first, embrace where you are in the diet and fitness process, and make a commitment to eating right and working out on a daily basis. You won't be sorry!

Click the following to return to the main page for Kathy's Divorced Girl's Guide to Health and Fitness

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Change Is Good

Episode 7 of Kathy Kaehler's vlog

Posted to by Kathy Kaehler on Tue, 02/02/2010 - 9:23am

Going through a divorce brings on so many changes — and not all of those changes are bad! Embrace the changes in your life and your workout routine. Kathy suggests mixing thing up a bit by adding strength training once or twice a week, trying new classes like cardio-salsa or even sports with your kids' Nintendo Wii. Incorporate changes in your workouts gradually and over time, you'll begin to reap the benefits.

Click the following for Part 8 of Kathy's Video Blog and Motivational Guide: Staying Motivated

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What's The Proper Workplace Divorce Etiquette?

Debbie Does Divorce with Maureen Wild

Posted to by Debbie Nigro on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 2:00am

Is there a right way to approach a colleague whose marriage is falling part? What should you say or do? Listen in as Debbie chats with etiquette coach Maureen Wild, president and founder of High Road Solutions, about how to properly interact with a co-worker who's going through a separation or divorce.

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How Credit Counseling Works

Posted to by Sanyika Callowa... on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 8:58pm

If you are downing in debt and the thought of filing bankruptcy doesn't work for you, consider working with a credit counseling service to help you get your financial life back on track.

While a credit counseling service will not eliminate your previous credit history nor offer you a debt repayment loan they will support you in providing:

• An evaluation of your personal financial situation

• A discussion of alternatives to bankruptcy, and

• A personal money/credit management plan

A typical counseling session will last about an hour and can take place in person, on the phone, or online. The National Foundation for Credit Counseling and Consumer Credit Counseling Services both offer counseling services free of charge for those consumers who cannot afford to pay. Otherwise, you may be charged a fee for the counseling, which will generally be about $50, depending on where you live and the types of services you receive.

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Stress Eating And Consequences

Episode 6 of Kathy Kaehler's vlog

Posted to by Kathy Kaehler on Fri, 01/29/2010 - 9:01am

Everyone deals with stress in different ways — but binging on fries, a slice of red velvet cake or a pint of ice cream won't help alleviate the stress of an upcoming mediation or a run-in with your ex at the market and it doesn't really soothe first post-divorce date jitters. Here, Kathy shares strategies on how you can deal with stress without sabotaging your fitness goals.

Click the following for Part 7 of Kathy's Video Blog and Motivational Guide: Change Is Good

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Elizabeth Edwards and the Toll of Infidelity

Posted to by Jill Brooke on Thu, 01/28/2010 - 10:03am

Maybe because I deal with a lot of divorced women who have had their hearts sautéed in a frying pan as a result of infidelity and disappointment, I am not surprised that Elizabeth Edwards could be both Saint Elizabeth and Lady Macbeth.

Some women are just driven to it. I am not making an excuse for her behavior, but I do understand it.

For me, the telling heartbreaking detail was what she said to one of her husband’s staffers after living in a bubble of denial for so long about her husband’s mistress Rielle Hunter and then having her illusions popped so publically. (Babies will do that). As reported in the book, “Game Change,” she desperately cried out, “I have to believe it. Because if I don’t, it means I’m married to a monster.”

The guy she married had indeed morphed into an unrecognizable, egotistical monster. But he was still the father of her children.

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