Community

Welcome to our Featured Community section, where you'll find women in various stages of divorce blogging about their lives, women that you, the members of the social network, have surfaced.

Choose a blogger that's relevant to you and follow along, support, advise, or cheer the journeys of women going through exactly what you're going through: (contemplating divorce: Maya Halpen, Megan Thomas, Gi Gi Hayden, Elaina Goodman) (navigating divorce: Alice Brooks, Sarah Farthing, Sondra Simmons) (moving beyond divorce: Faith Eggers, Nancy Lee, Joy Rose, Wanda Woodard).

Why You Can't Change Your Lover

Posted to by Delaine Moore on Wed, 03/10/2010 - 9:26am

Do you ever wonder if staying in an unhappy marriage for years has made you blind to warning signs as you date again? Are you so accustomed to "dealing with" relationship issues and compromising who you are/what you need, that you continue dating someone who’s already bringing you down?

Take Chuck for example, a man who recently wrote me asking for counsel around a woman he’s been dating for a month now. Although he really likes this woman, to his chagrin, she doesn’t like receiving oral sex.  When he tried to talk to her about it, she closed the conversation and laughed: “Hey, consider yourself lucky — I’ll never make you do it so you’re off the hook.”

Then, to make matters worse, he’s noticed that they can be in the same room for hours without her wanting any kind of physical contact — not even as much as a hug. "What do you think of her behavior, Delaine?" he asked. “What can I do to make things better?”

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Episode 43: Project Gay Divorcee

Excerpts from "The Petty Chronicles" Every Monday

Posted to by Rachel Gladstone on Mon, 03/08/2010 - 10:30am

“One less bell to answer. One less egg to fry. One less man to pick up after…and all I do is cry.” You may or may not remember these lyrics from a song recorded by The Fifth Dimension a million years ago, but whether or not you do, they sum up the feeling of being left and alone as well as any I can think of.

Sure it’s sad when your husband exits, stage left. Even though you couldn’t stand another minute of sharing airspace with him, it’s disconcerting to feel disconnected from the man you vowed to love forever. But the thought of not having to pick up after him anymore, fry an extra egg or answer his calls should bring you a modicum of relief right off the bat. And as days turn into weeks and months you will begin to feel good about yourself again. In fact you might even feel so happy, you’ll be ready pronounce yourself a Gay Divorcee and when this happens it will be a red letter day indeed!

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Episode 42: The Thrill Is Gone

Excerpts from "The Petty Chronicles" Every Monday

Posted to by Rachel Gladstone on Mon, 03/01/2010 - 9:05am

Once upon a time in the land of happily-ever-after, I enjoyed a great sex life with the man I promised to have and to hold. What had been a constant in our life ended with a whimper, not a bang, slowly riding off into the sunset until one day I was standing alone in the dark wondering what had happened. By the time I noticed it was gone, any traces of the heat between us had turned cold and I was at a loss as to the whys and wherefores of its disappearance.  

“The thrill is gone,” I told my girlfriends, hoping that they might be able to shed some light on the fact that my husband had lost all interest in me. “Maybe it’s just a phase he’s going through like the terrible twos or a penchant for wearing leisure suits,” one of them said. I had to laugh but really, the whole thing was far from funny.

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Shouldn't A Grown Man Know How to "Do It"?

Posted to by Delaine Moore on Fri, 02/26/2010 - 10:26am

Today I want to talk about a moment during sex that many of you probably haven’t analyzed before: That is, the moment of initial physical mergence. Cause you see, a close divorcing girlfriend of mine recently took a new lover whose ‘entrance’ made her roll her eyes…with annoyance.

To use an analogy, his ongoing technique resembled a Samsung Sewing Machine flicked on at high speed:  da-da-da-da-da — you get the picture. Even when she gave him subtle hints of what she wanted, ie, murmuring to ”go slow’ or holding him tight and close, he quick tailed it back into fast-gear.

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Unfaithful: Infidelity Takes on a New Meaning for Christian Couples

Posted to by Dwann Olsen on Wed, 02/24/2010 - 10:14am

I have such a low tolerance for marriage mates (male or female) who dishonor their vows via infidelity.

I really would describe it as the ultimate betrayal and just pure selfish. Needless to say, with all the talk about Tiger Woods’ apology and his newfound commitment to his mom’s faith, I figured I might as well chime in.

At first, I was going to name this post “Why Tiger Woods Is Better Than Most Christian Cheats” For real! lol

My thought was, heck, at least he’s apologizing to his WORLD of FANS, when it appears most preachers and Christian leaders who get “caught” or caught-up can barely apologize to their families, let alone their church congregations or ministry supporters who they truly owe some sort of apology to.

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A Great Adult Play Date

Posted to by Debbie Nigro on Mon, 02/22/2010 - 8:12pm

OK — I don't mean to brag but… How close was I to Eric Clapton and Jeff Beck performing at Madison Square Garden?

5th row center gets you this shot!

And…also got me shockingly yanked from behind by my collar by security who told me I was pushing it when I snuck up this close with my iPhone. LOL. Imagine?

I had a blast feeling 20 with my fun Divorced Dad Date who generously invited me to one of the greatest musical events I've ever seen! A Total WOW. I'm someone who appreciates genius in many forms and this was the guitar version of OMG. Their entire playlist was special but we were especially appreciative of these guys taking an old classic — my mother's favorite ,‘Moon River’ — and bringing it to life their way. Go figure. Just amazing.

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Episode 41: Shall We Dance?

Excerpts from "The Petty Chronicles" Every Monday

Posted to by Rachel Gladstone on Mon, 02/22/2010 - 11:00am

It’s hard to re-arrange your life when you don’t have a set of blueprints to follow or even some shred of a plan. You just have to feel your way along. You start out as a solo act, adopting various dance partners along the way until one day, bam! You meet the partner you never want to stop dancing with. Eventually, you tie the knot, set up housekeeping and begin the process of finding your way through the day-to-day maze of married life. You become attuned to his inner and outer rhythms, and he to yours. You become a duo — hopefully a dynamic one — and you boogie together through life. That’s how it’s supposed to be, at least that’s the ad campaign I grew up on.

So let me tell you, it was a painful moment for me when my husband lost his grip and began stepping all over my feet.

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