The Good, the Bad, and the Icky of Online Dating

The Good, the Bad, and the Icky of Online Dating

(check out my blog every Friday)

Okay, so Peter from Pelham never panned out. But the hits, they keep on coming, complete with lots of pep talk ("we're excited you're interested in Joe The Plumber!) and mumbo jumbo about my chemistry profile: it seems I'm a negotiator/explorer who is gracious, enthusiastic, and flexible (why thank you very much) who would have "jolly times" and "hearty laughs" with my matches.

And so far, I certainly have had some hearty laughs over their idea of my matches. I couldn't have been clearer that I'm a card carrying, blue state, bleeding heart liberal. If there had been a box that said Would Bear Obama's Children, I would have checked it. So why is chemistry.com sending me so many conservatives?

Or liars, like Wayne, who billed himself as being 53: "I'm a creative, caring, and passionate renaissance man who is 68 chronologically, but 53 in mind, energy, and spirit."

And Stuart, with his "cool Riverside pad" who is "looking for a lifelong romp or casual encounters." He too admits to being 57, but says he "looks 45."

Then there are the scary, grammatically challenged guys like the 6'4" correction guard, who presents himself like this, verbatim: "Just a nice guy looking for a companion friend at first...Not into liars, cheats, or game players. Trust is big in any type of relationship. I don't {like}people who will do certain things just to curb their curiosity. If your (sic) a person willing to have an affair with a married person then your (sic) a cheat even if you say you love them. I don't like liars and cheats your (sic) hurting alot of people when you do. I like up front and honest people who don't play with your emotions." EEK! More than a little angry?

The icky: Frank, who is "looking for a soulmate who can drink a case of me and still be on her feet...a woman who is real, so all you plastic people need not apply." And Allan, who wants someone "in good shape for her age (my emphasis) with a good cents (his typo) of humor. LOL. LOL." OMG — he's 55, uses IM speak and lives with his parents!

And the unbearably sad: the man who admitted that he had not dated in some time; indeed he's been alone his entire adult life. But at 61, "I now realize that this is not a satisfactory way to live. I want to change."

Me too. The channel.

But slowly, the tide began to turn. I'm intrigued by the PhD playwright/artist/sculptor; ditto the guy who claims he is "a good boy that knows how to be bad at all the right times." And the one who says: "I've been divorced for a long time. I've ripped up the ticket to Lourdes, I'm cured."

And I'm interested.