Posted to Divorce and Kids
by A.J. on Sun, 09/02/2012 - 3:07am
It was a Saturday; I remember the morning distinctly because that was when it happened. I was sat down in a big brown and cozy recliner and told by my Father that he was moving out, along with some cock and bull filler words. You know the kind they use to make bologna in those huge factories? Anywho, I guess you could call me a lucky sod; I slept almost the entire day! Lucky AJ! Not really.
read more >>
Posted to Divorce and Kids
by Alyssa on Thu, 07/19/2012 - 4:02am
I always had very special relationships with both my parents growing up. My father is very athletic, so whenever he had free time I would find myself playing golf or playing paddle tennis with him. When my older sister went off to college and my dad wasn't around that often, my mother and I became a team, always doing something together. I would run errands with her and she would go shopping with me.
She always encouraged honesty from me; no matter what the issue was which promoted an open line of communication, boyfriends, smoking and other high school issues were never taboo. My mom always trusted me and, as a result, I always trusted her.
read more >>
Posted to Divorce and Kids
by Antonio on Sun, 04/04/2010 - 1:24pm
The religious ping-pong — I can only speak on my experiences and give my opinion about what worked for me, so if it matches what you are going through, great!
My father is Catholic and my mother is born-again Christian. When my parents married my dad got baptized and became born-again. We practiced born-again Christianity every Sunday like a good little family should. When my parents divorced, my father actually didn't go to church for a while until he met his new wife, who was and is Catholic. So surprise, surprise — my father switched back to Catholicism.
I never worried about which church to go to up until this point because I had been going to the same church my whole life. One weekend my father took me to Catholic Church with him and I was so confused. I didn't understand all the sit, kneel, stand, sign of the cross, sit, stand, kneel, sit, stand, and "also with you" stuff. I gradually learned over time what to do and was fine.
read more >>
Posted to Divorce and Kids
by Alyssa on Fri, 05/23/2008 - 8:38am
When I found out my parents were getting a divorce, I was relieved. For some reason, I knew this was a step in the right direction for both my parents; what I didn't know was the difficult half-decade battle would overshadow my life. Graduating only a few days ago, I am now back in my house, living in the bedroom I grew up in. It's hard enough to move back after you have tasted the freedom of college, but what makes it even worse is that I am now an adult, trapped in a house with a constant tone of anxiety looming from my parent's divorce. It's hard to make a new start in a home that constantly reminds you of the past.
read more >>
Posted to Divorce and Kids
by Antonio on Mon, 05/12/2008 - 8:34am
I've said it before and I'll say it again, "kids aren't stupid" and they are very intuitive. I never saw my parents fight or even raise their voices to each other, but I knew they weren't happy. There was simply a shift in their behavior that didn't seem quite right to me. They didn't seem quite as affectionate as before. I noticed my dad started working longer hours than usual. My mother started taking me on more weekend getaway trips out of town. So what did I do when this started happening? I asked my parents up front "What's going on?"
Now I'm sure most kids aren't like me ... as a matter of fact, I know most kids aren't like me. Most would probably become shy little snails, some would lash out with bad behavior and others might even try hurting themselves because they feel in some strange way that the divorce is their fault. I never had that opportunity because of the forethought of my parents.
read more >>
Posted to Divorce and Kids
by A.J. on Fri, 05/09/2008 - 8:24am
The basic and average family unit consists of one maternal unit, one paternal unit, and on average two child units. This is the way children (including myself) are taught. That is what they believe to be unequivocally true along with such things as 2+2=4 and their ABC's. What divorce is, in the most stripped-down and harshest of terms, is the destruction of the basic family unit and a core belief in your child.
Depending on age and lifestyle-based circumstances, I guess you could say that your child will be affected in millions of different ways and possibilities than the kid next door or even me. That being said, I bet you're wondering, "What about my teenager? How will s/he deal with this?" It's floating somewhere in your mind, and frankly, it's a matter of great concern.
read more >>
