There are times, deep down beneath the strong faces we wear, that we realize that we are feeling scared, guilty, and maybe even ashamed. There is something inside of us looking for change, but we have no idea where to start. We want more out of life and our relationships, and honestly, we know we deserve it. It's often at these time that many turn to a certified relationship coach for help finding the healthiest way to happiness. Marieta Kane is a Certified Professional Coactive Coach, and through her practice The New Life, she dares women dare to create the life of their dreams, and on their own terms.
Tell us a little bit about your practice, Marjeta.
I am a personal growth coach and a relationship liberator on The New Life. I help women break out of unhealthy relationships (and habits) and create the life they TRULY desire. I bring deep personal experience, high level and accredited coaching training, and a degree in Psychology to bring life changing transformation to my client’s lives. My clientele is international (I coach via Skype and Facetime) and I also meet face-to-face with clients in New York. Giving exercises and holding clients accountable are two important facets that maintain momentum and keep the client focused and motivated to move forward. Most important to me is that I create a safe environment for my clients to open up, feel comfortable, and be open to get the help they need. I believe we all have the ability to create a life that is more fulfilling. However, very often we limit ourselves by the way we think and act. We feel stuck and scared to move out of our comfort zone because that’s what we know and that’s what feels comfortable. Those who are ready, committed, and have the desire to change have benefitted greatly from my practice and seen life-changing results.
What’s one of your favorite client success story?
All of my clients’ journeys are special, but I will pick one to share. I have a client who was trapped in a relationship with an abusive and narcissistic husband. When I first started working with her, she was fighting the attachment that she had from this relationship; she was in a war with half of her self. She wanted to escape but her fear and old habits had come many times to drag her back to her old life. But, down deep she was determined not to go back. Our sessions, exercises, accountability and her strong commitment kept her moving forward despite her pain. After an intense six months working together, she was able to move to a much happier place in her life. In her words, she felt: “Reborn. I feel I have won the lottery, like I won my life back, and that no one can take it from me again.”
What do you want your clients to discover while working with you?
The importance of self-love, which I believe is the root to healthy self-growth. With that discovery they have the power to create new lasting healthy habits, belief in self, and healthier relationships, the growth possibilities are endless.
Where are the clients in their challenge when they start working with you?
Each client is at a different stage. Some are still in an unhealthy relationship, some have started the healing/recovery process, and some have been divorced for a while but feel stuck and can’t move forward. While each situation is a little bit different, the feelings and challenges many face are similar.
What results do they want?
While the desired result may also vary by person, they all want to become freer and rediscover themselves again. They want to eliminate self-doubt, fear take control of their life.
How are you helping them get to where they want to be?
I start by creating a nurturing and trustful environment where they can open up and be honest about their challenges, goals, and feelings. As that environment of trust and openness is established, I employ techniques of coaching that allow them to tap into their true feelings, define what is most important to them, and things that they need to do to start the journey to a more fulfilling life.
What’s it feel like when you experience a client make a personal breakthrough?
Absolutely exhilarating! I love coaching because I take pleasure in helping people and making them happy. When a client is able to get to a better place in their life after we work together, I feel Inspired and very proud of the client for having the courage and initiative to make a change.
For how long does a client need help?
This varies by the client. The most important factors are (1) where are they are with their challenge. Someone in the throws of an unhealthy relationship may want a longer coaching path as they navigate addressing the relationship, recovery/healing, and finding that better, more fulfilling place. From my experience, at least 6 sessions are needed to forge meaningful change. Some of my clients have continued indefinitely.
You have national and international clients, many sessions of which you conduct through Skype. For those members of our community that haven’t yet experienced holding a session through Skype or video chat, can you explain that process and how it compares to an in-person session?
The process is the same and electronic sessions are very effective. The length of the Skype session is no different than the in-person session (sessions 50 minutes to an hour). In between sessions I will push my clients to engage in fun exercises and hold them accountable to taking specific steps that will help them on their journey to happiness. I check in with them before next session via email, and also hold a 15-minute pre-call if needed.
A number of our members are in the process of recovering from a marriage to a narcissist. What advice would you give with regards to the healing process from an abusive relationship?
My advice would be first to be kind to yourself and realize your goodness. Realize that you are embarking on a journey, not a sprint. Take pleasure in knowing that you want to make a change and you have taken the most important first step. Understand the past, let your emotion out, and don’t be ashamed, but balance that with an excitement about the journey ahead and the wonder the future holds.
Tell us about your e-book, The New Life. And what is its core message?
My e book, The New Life documents a piece of my marriage to a gambler and a narcissist - and how I felt lost, trapped, and that things were hopeless. It is the story of me realizing that I had to put myself first and begin to love myself if I were going to save my life from spiraling out of control. The core message is that no matter how bad things get and how hopeless one feels, inspirational things will happen with willingness to change. I want other women to know that this is what I went through, this is what I did about it, and that it led me to a much better place. They can do it too, take control, and achieve the life that they want.
What makes you happy?
Being with my family and helping people. I have a passion for taking the journey with someone to positive transformation. This makes me happy.
How can someone contact you to schedule a session?
How much do you usually charge for you’re a session?
I charge $100 per session and that includes exercises, email and text support for a month, one follow up session, and access to the private Facebook site where a client continues to get extra free support and attention from me) I do also offer discounts for students and women who can’t afford my regular prices.