You’ll be faced with a lot of different advice when you decide to “get back out there” and start dating after your divorce.
I always feel like most of what you hear is pretty useless, because every situation is different and you never know who you’re going to meet and what his attitudes are going to be. He may not care that you’re divorced. Or it may scare the hell out of him. There are too many variables for there to be any blanket advice that everyone should follow.
Nonetheless, the Web is full of post-divorce dating tips. I read a piece on CNN.com the other day that tried to delve into the question of when to tell a date that you’re divorced. And it also offered some advice about how much and how soon you should reveal things about your past. Again, I don’t think there’s a one-size-fits-all answer, but here are some things to consider:
1. Be honest about the status of your divorce. If it’s just getting started, that’s different than “I’m divorced.” Don’t be misleading because if a guy gets interested, he could resent you not telling him that you’re at the beginning of a long process.
2. Don’t drag out the details and drag your ex through the mud. Sure, he’s going to be curious if he’s really interested in you, but if you start moaning and groaning about what an ass your ex was, how do you think that’s going to look?
3. Mention that you have kids. Hello? This one should be obvious. You have to be careful you don’t come off looking like you’re asking him to be a second father to your kids, but he has to know you have them.
4. Be sure you’re really ready. You’re only doing yourself and your date a disservice if you try to jump back into the dating pool too soon.
Click the following for tons of tips from experts on getting back into the dating game post-divorce.