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Steve Davis, an esteemed senior cyclist, once gave a talk on winning. During his presentation he showed his collection of World Masters’ medals as well as referring to a quotation by Vince Lombardi, the American football coach, which he had taken to heart and made his own. “Winning is not a sometime thing, it’s an all time thing. You don’t win once in a while, you don’t do things right once in a while, you do things right all the time.”

However, he had then added this: “There is no room for second place. There is only one place and that’s first place.” This is a belief and way of life that leads to success whether it’s on the track or in the boardroom. However, it probably doesn’t translate too well in domestic situations.

As a family lawyer, I couldn’t help but think that for my own clients it is not a useful mantra. Divorce is no place for the “I don’t just need to win, I have to be seen to win” mentality, especially when frequently it is exactly that attitude that can cause a marriage to breakdown in the first place. So let’s leave winning where it belongs, in the competitive worlds of sport and business.

 

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