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First Wives World

First Wives World

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There is cathartic value in removing the Ex's things from your home.  I have been repainting and re-arranging almost every room in the house we shared.  I started with my bedroom, am just finishing the living room, then moving on to the dinning…
I can definitely say I am far better than six months ago, but I still have a long way to go.  I know I will survive and thrive, and that I am better off without him.  We will get through this.  There will be ups and downs along the way, but women …

Divorcing An Alcoholic Husband

Friday, 22 March 2013 12:33
There is nothing wrong with you!  You have finally come to the point that you realized you need to take care of yourself and that it was time to let this toxic person go.  When we step back out of denial, we begin to see the real picture and not…

Accepting You Can't Change Narcissistic Men

Thursday, 21 March 2013 18:11
Sometimes recognizing things for what they are and accepting you cannot change them [narcissistic men] is truly eye-opening.  I certainly found this out for myself (the hard way, lol) and I see how different things can be once I changed the way I…

Suit Yourself

Thursday, 21 March 2013 13:26
This post will be addressing a topic that strikes fear into the hearts of most women over 40.  Just thinking about it right now, is causing the sweat to pool across my hair line and heart to race.  It is another unGodly, heinous thing that cause…
I am surviving.  I am smiling.  I am laughing.  I am looking at other men.  I am going out on dates.  I walk down the street and am told I am beautiful.  A weight has lifted.  No more living up to someone else's unattainable standards.  I'm…
I will do what I have to do step by step to get through this, emotionally, financially and legally.  Step by step, and sometimes two steps backward.  After three years on my own, I am starting to realize that I am going to fine.  No, better than…

My Ex Left Me For A Much Younger Woman

Tuesday, 19 March 2013 11:30
Trust me when I say, you will get better, and you will survive and be happy.  Keep good, honest people around you and allow yourself to experience your feelings.  It's been four years since my Ex left me for a much younger woman, and it still…
The best way to get through this is to acknowledge and experience all of your emotions. You are entitled to feel them.  Don't judge yourself for feeling angry, sad, afraid or regretful about anything regarding your divorce.  Don't put yourself on…
I think the best thing for your daughter, and you, would be to show her the love you have for her, EVERY day.  This is a great opportunity for you to guide her into becoming a wonderful, compassionate, strong, independent woman.  Watching YOU…
Each day is a battle, so that makes us warriors in my opinion.  I will put on my warrior face and go into battle fully armed. I will keep busy, find my new home, do the right thing and hope for a good divorce to be the outcome of a toxic marriage.…

You deserve someone who loves you

Saturday, 16 March 2013 12:18
You deserve someone who loves you, not just "cares" about you.  Anxiety is caused when there is a gap or a tension between what we feel and our cognition.  I think to quell a spell, identify what you are feeling, attach a name to it, feel it, then …

No Aptitude for Altitude

Friday, 15 March 2013 23:25
When I last posted, I was preparing for an upcoming vacation with a new man, and a new sport; skiing.  I had taken a few lessons at Bill Jackson’s on an indoor ramp and bought a pair of wool socks.  No one told me about the other items I would…

I can tell you it gets better

Friday, 15 March 2013 18:33
As someone who went through exactly what you are currently going through, I can tell you it gets better.  Feel the fear, do what you need to do even though every bone in your body just wants it to be over.  Let your lawyer be your backbone and…
I had depression, but I emerged from the dark tunnel.  Divorce was my catalyst, but to this day I am grateful for knowing how I could fall and that I would come back again, better and stronger.  Be kind to yourself and have faith in yourself and…
Hang in there.  Stay positive.  You're doing great!  They keep telling me that it gets better, and it has, but it's still bad.  I don't want to rush time, but I want it to hurry up and go by so this will all be years behind me and I'll be in a…

The good and the bad make us who we are

Thursday, 14 March 2013 11:37
The good and the bad make us who we are.  Focus on yourself and your kids.  Show them and teach them you are more important than a toxic relationship.  Focus on the woman you want to be and not who you were with him or who you would be if you…
A community member recently asked the question of whether narcissistic men, also referred to as a “NARC”, are capable of changing their colors, and the responses from our resident first wives family provided a unified voice on the matter (see…

That no contact rule really does work

Tuesday, 12 March 2013 12:56
That no contact rule really does work. Don't let him get to you.  In the long run you'll be doing so much better.  There is only one man that I bow to and that is the Lord.  Don't dwell on him too much.  Do something for yourself that you…

You are a lot stronger than you think

Thursday, 07 March 2013 12:43
You are a lot stronger than you think.  You will be fine, I promise!  Don't let their attorney title intimidate you.  Fair is fair and the judge will see that.  Let your faith be bigger than your fear.  Be confident.  I will be thinking of…