Inspiration, Encouragement & Strength
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First Wives World

First Wives World

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Hugs.  So many of us have been and still are where you are.  It's horrible and painful, but you'll find it comes in waves.  You are very early in the process.  Take care of yourself.  That is the key now.  And I know this is hard, but stop…
You're getting on with your life.  You're moving forward each day another step.  Moving and trying to find a new place to live is extremely difficult on all fronts.  Be kind to yourself, your exhaustion is in full force.  Because goodness knows, …
I know it's hard but try to not think of of your marriage as time wasted, but just a path to this point in your life.  Stay strong.  It sounds like you're on the right path now.  I'm also so angry that the future my husband has laid out for…
You are not the one who failed your son, and you can't save a marriage when it's only you who wants to.  Right now, you still love him, but wait until the divorce process starts and see how you feel then.  It inevitably gets worse before it gets…
All I can say is focus on yourself and don't be sucked in by the bad.  The more you focus on yourself and your children, the less space there will be in your head for him.  Every time I start thinking about the bad stuff, I have to forcibly focus…
Living well is always the best revenge.  Find your happiness, teach your children that ethical people don't live their lives with lies and dishonor.  Give thanks for the wonderful man in your life now.  Work hard to let the anger and pain go and…
He is gone and done, and I am relieved, sad, coping and healing but moving forward.  I have a house.  I can decorate it with my own style.  I can get the kids the long anticipated dog.  I can walk through my own home on solid ground, not on a…
You are not moving backwards, you are going through the process of divorce, which has a roadmap and a timetable of its own.  We all go through it, good days and bad, and we learn to accept that it takes time as well as effort to get where we need…

Welcoming Change After Divorce

Wednesday, 27 March 2013 12:22
There is a part of you that wants nothing to change, but hopefully a small but growing part that is welcome to change. You are in the waiting/transition period. You must grieve your loss. Find time to cry. Seek solitude but not exclusively.
Everything will be alright.  You will be successful.  You will be financially secure.  You will find your adventure, your zen (at a moment you probably won't even expect it!)  You will find a partner and it will be amazing.  You will become a…

Surviving Domestic Violence

Tuesday, 26 March 2013 14:26
For me, it wasn't the divorce; it was the Domestic Violence that preceded it.  And somehow I am learning to feel released.  Facing the ugly is freeing me.  Be aware of what it is called.  Domestic Violence isn't just about one partner hitting…
Your story right there shows how strong a woman you are.  I totally understand how you feel and have been in very similar situations.  Hang in there.  It will get easier, the crying will diminish and at some point in time you will realize what a…
Your insecurities of being left are normal. I think it's about learning to be a better friend to yourself.  People will tell you that his cheating had nothing to do with you and they're right, but if you're like me you won't believe it until you…

Today I Have Chosen To Forgive My Ex

Monday, 25 March 2013 22:39
We are responsible for our own happiness, no one else.  When you are happy in yourself then everything else will fall in place.  Today I have chosen to forgive my Ex.  I already feel freer than I have in months.  I feel I will have control over…
You are okay just as you are.  It's okay to feel messed up, to not know what the future will bring, to feel unsure about your relationship with another person.  If I could give any advice, it would be to love yourself through this process.  Make…
I completely understand. You will make new connections and your limbs will entangle other people.  These new connections will become the backbone of your life.  Your past will not disappear, but will fade into the background.  It just takes time. …

Black Women Dealing With Divorce

Sunday, 24 March 2013 11:58
After ten months, my divorce was finalized on Thursday.  I feel like a real person again, alive again.  I was married for 20 years, and I now realize what a toll the years took on me.  I'm now taking steps each day to get my life back...
The color is creeping back in, dotting the medians along the interstate with a sprawl of white buds, prickly sprouts of waxy green buds curled on the bushes under my porch, patches of green blades pushing through ashen pine needles next to my shoe,…

Women's Divorce Support and Strength

Saturday, 23 March 2013 11:07
This site has given me so much support and strength.  I don't know how to say thank you to all of you.  Even the pain of this is less when you know someone is there thinking of you.  I wish everyone the very best, and remember that we are…
You are not alone in this.  There are so many stories of other women who have been in these abusive relationships  You have nothing to be ashamed of.  I was married to a narcissist for over 27 years, and I knew something was wrong with him and…