At this time of year, families come together and it's a time of celebration. What do you do if you are in the middle of the divorce processduring the holiday season? You may find it hard to sing, "Joy to the World" or light the candles on the menorah or share stories of Kwanzaa when you are feeling as if your life is falling apart.
Here is the great news about the holidays — they don't change! No matter what changes you are going through in your personal life the holidays will always come around. They're part of the solid ground that transcends what's happening on the surface of our lives. This is a season of peace, sharing, love and gratitude. You owe it to yourself to celebrate and dig deep to find that peace, sharing, love and gratitude.
Here are a few tips that will help you do just that:
- You're newly single. This means doing what you want to do and celebrating in a way that brings you joy. Create new traditions, ones that reflect who you are as an individual. Make a list of the things that will bring you happiness during the holidays and make a point of incorporating everything on your list into your celebrations.
- Since the holidays are about sharing, why not spread the joy? Focusing on others will take you mind off your own problems. Expand your list of people to welcome into your celebrations. Take the time to do things for those less fortunate by cultivating a generous heart and a giving spirit. Nothing lifts a person's spirits as much as doing for others.
- There are many things to celebrate during the holidays. That doesn't mean there can't be time for tears as well. You will experience mixed emotions, so give yourself permission to wallow in the heartache. But only up to a certain point. Have a good cry, get it out of your system, then get back to experiencing the joys of the season. Don't postpone the joy just because you're going through a divorce. Remember, divorce will lead to a new life and many changes but the holidays never change! They will be there year after year and will survive anything that's happening in your life. Find moments of joy during the holiday season, be grateful for them and share them.