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On Valentine's Day, every woman of every age should be issued one tall, dark, handsome somebody to share long, loving looks and dinner over candlelight. Cold pizza in front of the TV isn't so bad, most of the time. That particular day, though, has the power to leave a single woman feeling hopeless and unloved — and cold pizza just doesn't cut it.

It seems everywhere I look lately I see red, heart-shaped boxes of chocolate and lovely cards with pink hearts reminding me of the day set aside for honoring love. For me, Valentine's Day brings to front all the romantic longings and yearnings I've kept tucked away in crimson colored recesses of my heart. Romantic longings and yearnings that can rise up like a title wave to overwhelm me.

But then I remember that Valentine's Day is about LOVE. It is about love for ourselves, our friends, our family, those who have helped us, those who need our help and those who, by birth and friendship, are our family.

Valentine's Day can also be a day of remembering situations worse than being alone. It is better to be...

  • A woman alone than a woman whose husband belittles her.
  • A woman standing alone than a woman being dragged down by negative emotions.
  • A woman loving life than a woman who dreads each day spent in an unhappy marriage.
  • A woman who gives her heart to her work, her children, her friends and family or any good cause other than a husband who won't cherish the heart she has to give.

So, if you are alone this Valentine's Day, don't spend the day pining away for a knight in shining armor or some tall, dark handsome someone to share loving looks and dinner over candlelight. Don't spend the day brooding over what you wish you had, but spend it celebrating the love you already have.

Take your father a box of chocolates. Send your mother a single red rose. Give the girlfriend who helped you through your divorce a gift certificate for a pedicure. Share the love you have and you will never be alone. Not on Valentine's Day or any other day.

Cathy heads's Divorce Channel.


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