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Before my divorce, I was not a very open person. In other words, I had very little interest in new experiences and I rarely thought “outside the box” that was my world. I liked tradition and predictability and didn’t like anyone messing with the life I had built for myself and my family.

Needless to say, I had a hard time accepting and healing from my divorce. The less open a person is to change and thinking “outside the box”, the more difficult they will find it to adjust when someone screws with the life they have designed for themselves. In this article I want to share with you things I’ve learned over the years that will help you become more open and accepting of change, whether that change is of your choosing or not.

Try Something New:

You may feel as if something new has been forced upon you and the last thing you need is “something new.” You are wrong, though. Now is the time to become an explorer. Your life is in transition, like it or not, so you may as well take control of where you will end up by being open to all possibilities. Do something you’ve always wanted to do but never thought yourself capable. You are both capable of doing it and enjoying it.

Learn To Give And Take:

Let go of your inflexibility. People who are not open to change are generally inflexible toward others and their differences. If your ex has turned into someone you no longer know, instead of doing battle with him on every issue, become more flexible…willing to give and take. Be open to suggestions, willing to consider and deal with something that would usually cause you discomfort. Being flexible will make others more likely to give in when an issue is really important to you.

Take Stock Of What You Are Missing:

If you refuse to try new things or fight accepting change as it comes, you are limiting the experiences you can have in life. Divorce is an opportunity that can open one’s mind. It may be an opportunity that comes with emotional pain but it is an opportunity nonetheless. Be open to the chances for change and learning that come along with this opportunity. If you permit, you can become receptive to change and more understanding of whom you are and what you want.

 

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3 comments

  • Comment Link Guest Friday, 31 August 2012 10:46 posted by Guest

    You just described me: As I read all I could do is nod my head yes... "I rarely thought outside the box", I was "inflexible toward others and their differences". If there's anything I have to thank divorce for is learning to be such an open person, it has been liberating for me & a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

    I'm so much happier! I'm glad I've had the chance to explore this other side of myself.

  • Comment Link Guest Friday, 31 August 2012 10:45 posted by Guest

    You just described me: As I read all I could do is nod my head yes... "I rarely thought outside the box", I was "inflexible toward others and their differences". If there's anything I have to thank divorce for is learning to be such an open person, it has been liberating for me & a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

    I'm so much happier! I'm glad I've had the chance to explore this other side of myself.

  • Comment Link Guest Friday, 17 April 2009 10:05 posted by Guest

    I Agree: We are all on a journey, and as you said, "...now is the time to become an explorer."
    That's what I did, and I realized so much about myself. I'm still just a student of life, myself. And, you, dear Cathy, are a good teacher! - Wanda Woodard