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Nervous about that first post-divorce date? Don't worry. I have a few tips that will help you put your mind at ease so you can relax! Here are three Do's and three Don'ts of post-divorce dating:

DO remember that your first date after divorce is not about looking for a new husband! Have fun. If you haven't been in the dating scene for a while, a new date is a great chance to practice your dating muscle again.

DO stay upbeat and positive rather than talking about your baggage. Everyone has baggage at a certain age — learn to unload it gradually, over time as you and your date get closer. Remember, some mystery is good at the beginning of dating!

DO remember that being divorced is nothing to be ashamed of. Without dwelling on details of your past, be honest about your divorce status if you are asked about your relationship history rather than have your date find out after the fact.

DON'T spend the entire first date comparing the person to your ex spouse. If you do this, you won't be present or show up as your best self on the date.

• If you have children, DON'T introduce your date to them before or after a first date. Meet your date at a public place and let your connection grow before you involve your kids.

DON'T go on a date to get back at your ex. This is YOUR time. When you feel ready to start dating again, you are making a statement to yourself that you are ready to embrace a new and exciting chapter of your life.

Go out and have some fun!

http://lisasteadman.com/blog/

Lisa has a lot of great information and articles about breaking up and moving on.

 

Related Articles:

Getting Back in the Dating Game

The Little Red Flags of Post-Divorce Dating

Click the following to return to the directory for Sex and Dating Post Divorce

 

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3 comments

  • Comment Link Guest Thursday, 26 May 2011 13:16 posted by Guest

    Dating after Divorce: The advice provided is awesome, but a little lost on me. My divorce began in Feb. 2003. It was long and vicious, maybe the longest divorce on record in Ontario. I have not been with a man since my ex in Nov 2002 (8 1/2 years ago), no physical, no dates since then. I have talked to men on the phone (anonymous sex talk to please them) but that is it. How many people agree that I need psychiatric help or counselling to "move on" and start actually dating?

  • Comment Link Guest Thursday, 31 March 2011 05:32 posted by Guest

    That is a great idea! I: That is a great idea! I specifically am looking to date other divorcees as only they can 'get it' like a never married person can't.

  • Comment Link Guest Friday, 09 July 2010 14:00 posted by Guest

    Nice Little List: Wish it was 1000 words longer haha! Very informative. I don't know why it always happens but it seems like whenever I'm with another man I have to compare him to my ex. I've been divorced for 3 years now, but it just keeps coming up. But I think once I can get over that step, it'll certainly help. Tell me, with all of these niche dating sites around here, wouldn't it be nice to see a http://www.datingsite.org">dating site that is catered specifically to divorced people? I mean they have sites for religious and age specific dating, even with special interests. Wouldn't it be easier for everyone to meet each other on an even playing field so there's no surprise "ex" stories? If this hasn't been made yet I call patent pending hehe.