Inspiration, Encouragement & Strength
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Encouraging Words From Your Peers

Excerpts from Our Community to You

Oh I'm so sorry you are going through this. I'm dreading the day I find out the Other Woman is pregnant. Sending you hugs. As for giving the relationship another go, someone wise once said who was one of the only people to stand by me when I went back for a second try at working out the marriage after the first Other Woman, the next time you leave you will be able to walk away completely. Though I am still going through the raft of emotion that go with the end of a relationship and healing the damage of years off verbal degradation, I know I gave my best and feel resolved that there is no hope what so ever ... (continue reading)

I’m so glad for you are finding your happy place. Divorce is not the end of life, but the beginning of a new one. I feel exactly the same way on everything you described. I was lonelier being married than I have been being divorced - no doubt about that! But my glow is back and I'm my happy go lucky self! Congrats on the beginning of your new life! And I too feel like a butterfly ready to soar! I felt like that last year when I found out my ex cheated on me as well. There is happiness and I am sure you will find it. Just give yourself time to heal and grieve. It is possible ... (continue reading)

Take some time to figure out what you want and what is best for you and your kids. Yep, it stinks to think the "happily ever after" dream we have had doesn't work out. Doesn't mean it won't happen, just maybe not with him. It seems like at first the bad days outweigh the good, but then the good days start outweighing the bad until there are more good days than bad. Sadness is okay, mourn for you, mourn for the marriage, it's okay. I think what helped me heal was letting my emotions come and dealing with them. Crying when I needed to. Sometimes we have no idea how miserable we are until we leave and get some clarity. As someone said, how much of this do you want to put up with, because in the grand scheme of things, the years of my marriage are not a long period of time. I also was done being a doormat and am so much happier now. Figure out what you need. You are stronger than you think you are ... (continue reading)

I'm sorry you are suffering so much. It totally sucks, and you can't go around the pain, you just have to go through it. You'll certainly move forward, but then suddenly be blindsided by emotion. This is all completely normal. Boy do I understand the desire to be pain-free! I wish I could give you a magic formula to relieve your pain. Getting up every morning is great start. You'll feel like a zombie but keep going. You don't have to go under because of this. You can rise up instead. Eventually you will make new plans, dream new dreams. People who know you will be in awe of how you've blossomed and conquered adversity. Meanwhile, make sure you are taken care of financially; keep your head during negotiations, get a good attorney. It is the business of your future you must attend to. You deserve more than you think you do. Time doesn't heal all wounds (that's a crock), but it can give you perspective. Please just hang in there, and give yourself credit for hanging in there. Having a to-do list helps me focus on something besides my pain. Even if I just get one thing done, it's a small victory… (continue reading)

Now that you have been with a man who you describe as a narcissist - you can identify one and avoid that rattrap. You sound much wiser that you think. Try to take it a day at a time and wait - before committing to a new relationship. We all want to be loved and appreciated. Right now, I am trying to focus on recovery of self doubt - once I can get through a full day without questioning if I could have done something to prevent the problem that the man in my life (husband) created - then I am ready to move on to trying to focus on a working as a team. It is hard to fix a problem that another creates. Why I think I should have seen it coming - is currently the question of the day! Be strong and try to focus on how to make you feel okay. Feeling co-dependent or weakness may not be the top issue - try to look at yourself as a caring person that has weaknesses because you have emotion. Egocentric behavior is much worse. You seem like you just are having a hard time sorting your feelings. Give it time ... (continue reading)