Inspiration, Encouragement & Strength
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Megan Thomas
The soundtrack of my life is, "Should I Stay or Should I Go?" by The Clash. I don't even like The Clash.
I've been married for a little under 10 years. My husband and I met when we were both serving in the military, and after a long friendship we became inseparable. Our real marriage troubles began a couple of years ago, and right now I'm in the miserable stage of "Contemplating Divorce."
My husband doesn't want to separate. I'm having issues with breaking up our family. Basically, I'm a mess. If it wasn't my mess, I'd think it was actually pretty funny.
I'm in my mid-thirties and I have two kids who I love more than I ever thought possible. My kids are pretty young: one still in diapers and the other on the verge of starting preschool. I stay home with them during the day and manage to get my writing done when I can, but I'm really happy that I'm able to be their primary caregiver. My kids rock.
I do find plenty of things to keep me occupied. I do plenty of volunteer work and I'm very active in my church. My kids — and the mass quantities of coffee I consume — are what keep me going throughout the day. I know that someday soon I'll be forced to finally take some definitive action because I certainly can't keep going on like this with my marriage in limbo. No amount of coffee can make me forget that things just aren't right, but it certainly helps to add a ton of mocha and whipped cream.
Most Recent Articles
Is Sex Truly An Absolute Physical Need For Men?
Friday, 18 February 2011 08:30
I have a question that I can't ask anyone face-to-face without blushing, so I'll present it here. My husband has always given me the impression that sex is an utter physiological need for all men.Without regular sex, men have physical pain that…
Photos of My Husband... and Another Woman
Friday, 05 June 2009 23:22
My husband posted some pictures on his website from a weekend outing he went on with some work friends. It's uncanny how although the ratio of men versus women in his group is something like 20:1, with men greatly outnumbering the women, my husband…
Grande, Skim, No-Whip Questions About My Marriage
Saturday, 30 May 2009 00:59
The poignant question of the day came from the most unexpected source: the barista in the Starbucks drive-thru. I stopped to get a coffee on my way to a secret wedding in the park. A couple of my friends from church were eloping and asked me to be…
With My Husband Gone, I’m Like the Little Engine That Could
Saturday, 23 May 2009 13:39
My first car was a really old, beat-up car that I would drive to my night classes at the local college. To get to the campus, I had to climb a steep hill and I would always pat the dashboard and try to convince my car that everything would be…
When the In-Laws Blame Me, It’s the Kids Who Suffer
Saturday, 16 May 2009 21:43
It looks like news of our marital unrest has spread to my husband's side of the family. I wouldn't say that his family ever really liked me, but they have always tolerated me and have been cordial. We just come from different backgrounds and…
I've Become the Parent Who Isn't Daddy
Saturday, 09 May 2009 10:24
If I've learned anything in my husband's absence it's that the kids miss him terribly. They don't like being away from him. I guess before he left I had this idea that the kids and I would adjust somewhat easily to where we just got used to…
If Marriage Were A Renewable Contract, Would I Have Renewed?
Sunday, 03 May 2009 14:30
My friend has an interesting idea. I don't know if she read this somewhere else or if it's something she came up with on her own, but she thinks that marriage should be a contract that comes up for renewal every few years. For instance,…
Are All Those Single Women Smarter Than Me?
Tuesday, 21 April 2009 22:52
Let me just get this out of the way right off the bat: I watch too much reality TV. My only defense is that I work late into the evening and some nights the only way to stay awake is to switch on the television and have the noise of mindless shows…
I'm Not Quite Ready to Take My Kids Down the Divorce Path
Wednesday, 15 April 2009 10:44
If I followed my heart I would be divorced already. It's been a long time since I felt as though my marriage was working, and when I daydream about being happy it doesnât include my husband. I make enough money to live comfortably, although it…
I Feel Stuck. How Did My Life Turn Out This Way?
Wednesday, 08 April 2009 11:50
I've been staring at my computer screen for the past 20 minutes trying to think of how I can write what is going through my head right now with regard to my marriage. Just when I think I have a cognizant thought, I dismiss it as stupid."Maybe I…
Dad's Away, And My Son's Acting Out
Tuesday, 31 March 2009 10:12
My son has started acting out. He's been potty trained for over a year and suddenly he's wetting his pants. He's also doing some things that I thought we would never see again: biting, having huge temper tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants,…
I'm Going To Have To Try Harder To Appear Sad That My Husband Is Gone
Tuesday, 24 March 2009 10:15
I think I embarrassed myself last night. I ran into Kim, who is another mom from my kids' preschool. We were at the same restaurant, so I went over to her table on the way out so our kids could say hi to each other. She was with another woman who I…
Is a Civil Dis-Union Possible?
Wednesday, 18 March 2009 08:37
I spend a lot of time thinking about the what-ifs associated with ending my marriage. What if my husband tries to turn the kids against me? What if he stops paying his portion of the bills and I wind up with a house in my name that I can't afford to …
I Wish I Missed My Husband
Wednesday, 11 March 2009 09:57
I've been husbandless for almost a week now. He's overseas on a work assignment and he'll be there for a year. He'll visit every few months, but essentially the kids and I are on our own. Things have been a little tricky as the kids adjust to not…
Happy Accident: My Husband's Leaving for a Year
Wednesday, 04 March 2009 08:02
Should I write about how my husband joyfully announced to a house full of guests that if I ever cheated on him he would put me in the ICU? Or maybe I should write about how he suddenly thinks it's hilarious to tickle me and poke at me while I'm…
If Science Could Predict My Marriage's Failure Rate, Would I Want To Know?
Wednesday, 25 February 2009 07:55
A scientist in the book Blink claims he can predict likelihood of a couple's divorce with 95% accuracy by observing them.How? Married couples are filmed while having a conversation on a topic of disagreement. They aren't arguing, but instead…
Is Our Lukewarm Relationship Fair To My Husband?
Tuesday, 17 February 2009 21:16
In our last marital counseling session, my husband and I discussed our communication. I explained how I feel really disconnected to him. I told him that I don't feel close to him and I don't know how to change my feelings. Lord knows I've tried, but …
My Husband's Leaving. Is it For Good This Time?
Wednesday, 11 February 2009 07:59
I have less than a month until my husband moves out of the country for a year on a work assignment. I've been getting mixed reactions from people about it; the people who don't know that my husband and I are having difficulties feel really pity for…
If My Husband Cheats, He Gets the Boot
Tuesday, 03 February 2009 10:57
I read with great interest Cathy Meyer's article, What to Do if Your Husband is Cheating. I know she's the expert, and I'm certainly not, but I don't think I can be as reasonable about an affair…