It's funny: one of the biggest factors in keeping a loveless, abusive, or otherwise bad marriage going is entropy. It's a state of stasis born from a fear of change or of being alone or even just from laziness, and it keeps people together for far longer than they should be. But while entropy is a powerful force, momentum is just as powerful. Momentum can carry you from unhappiness to separation to divorce, which can be a blessing, but it can also keep the fighting going for far longer than it should.
Fighting has its own internal logic, and it can be self-perpetuating. All the anger from those stifled years comes out, and the desire to get in the last word, whether metaphorically or in actuality, takes over. This can be cathartic, but if it keeps going, it leaves you in a situation where you are just as trapped. We have to break the fear and the entropy that keeps us in bad situations, but we also have to make sure we know when those emotions and that momentum has served its purpose. We need to be able to put that away. Your whole life needs to be a perpetual motion machine, not just your anger.
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