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I was cleaning up around the house yesterday and as I went to put a book back on the shelf, a title that I'd already read popped out at me. It's called "How We Choose to Be Happy: The 9 Choices of Extremely Happy People" by Rick Foster and Greg Hicks.

While I've read the principles of these secrets before, I felt compelled to open up the pages and revisit the stories shared about people that are truly happy. The nine principles are: Intention, Accountability, Identification, Centrality, Recasting, Options, Appreciation, Giving, and Truthfulness.

I've had two weeks to digest my thoughts during my time off from work and have really spent time pondering the past and trying to engage in a future that I want. I had an eye-opener as I flipped through the pages of the book — I haven't been truthful with myself. I never stood up for my feelings and asked for what I knew I needed. I looked for alternative routes of finding the love, appreciation, and desire that I thrived on as an individual because my ex didn't offer these things to me.

The sad thing is, he was disappointed that I had given up looking for these things from him. I'd been put on the backburner so long and constantly walking on eggshells, that it was impossible for me to reach the connection we had when we met almost ten years ago. It's tragic, really. I know now, that I need to stay truthful to myself in all avenues of life. I never should have denied myself this openness, and certainly not for the sake of someone else. I've learned my lesson the hard way. But, now I know. I resolve to make sure I'm truthful with myself every day.

Bottom line is we choose to be happy and can find something that pleases us, or do something that pleases us everyday. Sounds refreshing, doesn't it?

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1 comment

  • Comment Link movinon58 Saturday, 07 May 2011 09:47 posted by movinon58

    Sounds familiar: When they become aware that we are not looking to them anymore for the love and intimacy we desire and substitute it with other things, then they pull away more. I have come across an article that describes this behavior. It is called passive-aggressive. Something to google and read about. It explains it all. Now I know I am not crazy. It took years of this subtle manipulation to bring me to the brink. I feel as though I need to thank him for leaving ME before I turned into a complete basket case.