I see a lot of new ladies that sign into our private community here looking for support as they're navigating their divorce(s).. and have no idea where to start.
I know from my own experience that I lurked for weeks before I got up the courage to start posting. As far as 'courage' goes, let me assure you that if you've got it bad, chances on this board are that someone else has been there first. Be strong, we aren't going to bite. Post a hesitant hello if that's all you feel up to, and don't get scared if noone responds right away. Remember these are a bunch of single moms/dads now, so noone has the time they used to have.
Let's assume you are lurking — I'll give you a list of stuff to read while you get up the courage to post. I've chosen articles that I wrote as a strong backbone to this because 1/they garnered a lot of hits which make me think a lot of women got something useful and 2/I wrote them specifically to help in certain situations or with certain topics. I've also chosen some blogs that while in themselves weren't an answer, did garner a lot of useful feedback.
The other advice I have is to take a deep breath and realize you are not in anyway alone. Think of these forums as your safe place. Join now and find an array of support groups and posts on topics like the below:
- 12 Steps of Divorce - Your emotional progress list as you go through this period of turmoil
- Divorce PDSD - The emotional slides and shifts you can expect and how it may effect your life
- 12 Hard Truths I was forced to learn through my divorce - 12 things you may encounter as you begin this path
- The one where she hates - Learning the opposite of love
- Denial - Learning to stop yourself from the slide down to Bitter
- Will they ever get a visit from Karma? - Amazing responses to this commonly asked question
- Learning the Divorce Language - Basic divorcee slang from around the forum
- Breaking - A beautiful response from Mayabella about the heartbreak of a spouse moving out
- In defense of Dads - A wonderful post about learning to suck it up for the sake of your kids
- A Letter to the "Other Woman - Written by a First wife, but full of wit and humor and worth the read
- Divorce is a Unique Opportunity - Learning to reinvent yourself after Divorce
- How to Hang Up on a Troll - Cutting contact without losing your mind
These are just good places to start. I hope some of this helps you. There is sooo much on this forum that addresses how to begin and where to start. I'd point you at Maybella and Virgo27 as 2 other women who write excellent responses [that I wish they'd repost as blogs].
Don't give up. You aren't alone.