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Now that we all know what we shouldn't — that there's been a Tiger in just about every  tankini — Elin Woods and her kids are off to Sweden. So what now?

Lots of anger and depression and humiliation all around… enough to make a mother-in-law collapse. She did.

Though you wouldn't know it by his golf acumen, Tiger Woods is huMAN. So let me comment on the huMAN angle.

Ask any man who has lost his family to a fling and he'll probably tell you he deeply regrets it. He had few regrets at the time it was happening — when he thought he had figured out the best of both worlds.

For all the negative commentary on marriage being an “institution” that's been likened to prison, most men don't like going life alone.

Women are much better at it.

Married men like having their families to return home to after being MEN all day. They love their children and home cooked meals and their couches and their cozy wives. They need it. It's just that some of these men can't eliminate the excitement of sex with strange women.

So some don't. Others wouldn't dare risk it.

Some men compartmentalize and justify “Home Life” vs “Hidden Life”.  Why break up a perfectly good family life because of sex? Some men can justify the double existence to themselves.

Unlike men, most women who stray sexually are usually “done” with the marriage in their heads. Most often, men aren't done, just dabbling with a double-dip or two — or in this case, 12 — without major consideration of the end their home life.

You see, the two lives are never supposed to cross. Many married men never really consider the severity of the “outing” of their Hidden Life until they are alone on some couch, reviewing the tape in their heads.

The cheating game is only played well when they feel home base is covered. When home base cracks, most double dipping men crumble. They rarely anticipate the ramifications of their decisions and choices personally or professionally when it blows up. They wonder how they could have been so stupid to have gotten caught. 

Then they suffer, because they realize they aren't as strong without the support and love of their family — they never imagined being alone without their kids, without a wife to cheat on.

True blue friends will stand by unconditionally, but cheating men suffer the extended consequences too of character assassination in the eyes of extended family and friends — and in Tiger Woods’ case, unfortunately the whole world.

The real kick is that they will likely lose the sex drive that got them into the whole mess in the first place, and have no interest in the meaningless women whose charms they succumbed to. And to top it off, they will be seriously unable to focus on whatever it was they were doing everyday before.

Game over.

The regrets are usually bigger than the thrill when the two compartments open at the same time.

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  • Comment Link Guest Wednesday, 25 August 2010 16:35 posted by Guest

    Yep!: I think you're right that most men do compartmentalize. It's often part of their sense of entitlement -- after all, philandering has been accepted if not encouraged in many societies, including ours, for years. It comes with the corner office and "tough" day at work.