I read with great interest Cathy Meyer's article, What to Do if Your Husband is Cheating. I know she's the expert, and I'm certainly not, but I don't think I can be as reasonable about an affair as the article seems to prompt women to be.
You know what I just can't get to fit nicely into my brain? It boggles my mind that an affair could be something that my husband and I could work through together rationally and come out of it all stronger than before. Maybe I look at things a little differently, but here is what really gets me: sex with someone other than your committed spouse is dangerous. Even with a condom, you can wind up with some really nasty diseases that at the least will give you unsightly sores and at the worst can kill you in a slow and painful death. Am I really supposed to work to save a relationship with someone who is willing to give me a life-threatening disease just because he wanted something different in bed?
It's a different world out there. A one-time sexual encounter (especially if it's in the heat of the moment and there is no protection involved) can kill you, and can kill your spouse who you go home and sleep with after you're finished having your fling.
No, I'm not willing to pensively approach my husband and coddle his emotions if I know for sure he's having an affair. If he's so stinking miserable with me that he's willing to kill us both — even if it's indirectly by contracting a sexually transmitted disease — then he's not the kind of guy I'm willing to stick around with.
I'm not going to be reasonable if I find out my husband is cheating. I will pack his bags and leave them on the porch. The end.