According to tech-gossip blog Valleywag, investors in internet search powerhouse Google should start paying closer attention to their profit and loss statements. That's because Eric Schmidt, Google's CEO, has reportedly been diddling the company's former New York press consultant, Marcy Simon, and is now heading for a nasty divorce from wife Wendy.

Since Schmidt owns several billion dollars worth of Google stock, a divorce could throw the stockholder balance out of whack, provided there isn't a prenup. However, that seems to be the least of Google's worries. Apparently, there is a connection between the CEOs buying a big new house and stock prices plummeting — and according to reports, Schmidt is picking up an apartment in Manhattan for he and Simon to make their love nest, at the bargain-basement price of $25 million.

Valleywag thinks Schmidt ought to have to report to Google shareholders on any potential stock losses due to his divorce, as well as his home-buying plans. There's even a suggestion he should add his extramarital proclivities to Google's SEC filings — that's just what we want, more sex in government documents. Does anybody remember the Starr Report?

If there's anything to the rumors, though, shareholders might want to tread with caution. I don't know about others, but I'm thinking it may be time to invest in pork bellies instead.

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