We've come a long way from Emily Post and old school Miss Manners. Etiquette books used to be about appropriate table settings and the socially correct way to address a wedding invitation. With a divorce rate that seems to be permanently set at 50 percent and an awkwardness quotient that sits at around 100 percent, it's not surprising that people have questions.

In a recent piece I read, the friend of a divorcée is looking for help. Seems like the ex-wife went on a bit of a hate campaign and rallied her friends into believing the husband was completely at fault. The friend, now divorced herself, has come to realize that nothing is ever as black and white as it seems, feels bad for alienating the guy and wants to recreate a friendship with him.

So what's the etiquette here? Personally, I think there's no reason to rekindle that friendship. If the split was recent, everybody's feelings are going to be hurt and this woman will end up in the middle of something ugly. If it was a long time ago, the guy has probably moved on and doesn't want to dredge up the past. If he hasn't moved on, she's going to end up playing Agony Aunt to a bitter and lonely man, which doesn't exactly make for lively dinner party conversation.

My advice? Learn from your mistakes, but don't try to get someone else involved in fixing them. You treated this guy like crap because you believed the venom your friend was spewing about him. Apologize if it makes you feel better, but leave the door closed. When you find yourself in this situation again — and you will, because everybody and their mother is getting divorced these days — don't be so quick to judge.

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