firstwivesworld - Is the Loneliness Finally Gone? - Comments

It means that you are healing wonderfully!

Guest — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 10:51:32 -0400

I knew that I was a great place in my healing several weeks ago one night when I loved sitting on my favorite couch reading, then watched a great moving while having whatever the hell sounded good for dinner, left clothes on the bed that I did not feel like folding, and then curling up to bed for a great nights sleep. I woke up the next morning without any feeling of loneliness. Instead, I was glad that I had only me to do with whatever I wanted. So, instead, I may feel sometimes the need to spend time with someone, but now it is time with whomever I would connect to at the moment, whether my friends, family, or a man on a date. Whomever it is, I figure it out and make it happen, but if the plans don't work out, I am still happy and content exploring on my own. And, what a WONDERFUL place that is to be, because at one point I never thought I would be in this place. I am so glad that you are, too.

Enjoy every moment. CM

Guest — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 21:52:05 -0400

Enjoy every moment. CM

Is the Loneliness Finally Gone?

Alice Brooks — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 15:00:36 -0400

I just had a very odd moment.

Sometimes I get lonely. I'm never quite sure what it is what I want when this happens, I just get knocked a little flat by the reality of my solo flight.

I'm up too late. When I finally tear myself away from the computer, flip off the reality TV I watch when I'm grading papers, start to straighten up for the night, I'm hit with a wave of lonely.

Normally, when this happens, I curl up in my comfiest chair and just sit in the feeling for a while. So I figured, okay, well, I'll do this for a bit. I'll have a contemplative little 15 minutes.

But then — and this is the odd bit — it just went away. I looked around my living room, the apartment that's just mine. It's neat, because no one else is here to mess it up. There's a cookie left on a plate on the coffee table, and it's still going to be there tomorrow, because no one will sneakily eat it when I'm not looking. There is nothing in this place that is ugly, that I don't want, that I keep around because I have to.

Tomorrow I'm going to a job that I choose to have. I will be wrestling, all day, with what I'm going to do with my life next, but that choice, when I make it, will be mine, too.

I was all set to have my little moment in my comfy chair, feeling sad and alone and such, and I just can't do it. I don't want anyone else here. I miss the boy, it's getting harder to say goodbye to him each time I do, but — I am loving having my own life.                                        