Gifts/Divorce--more info: https://whatwontpilartell.blogspot.com/

jill hunter — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 13:57:35 -0500

I had just the opposite problem. My ex-husband, in his reasons for wanting a divorce, listed the fact that I always got him really great presents (even for no special occasion), planned fun vacation trips for him to places that he knew I would not otherwise go (e.g. golf resorts) , and threw him a number of surprise parties during our 30-year marriage that he really enjoyed. The problem, he said, was that he could not do anything like that himself (even though I never expected him to), and he was angry because I would not give him a list of things I wanted for my birthday or Christmas. I just couldn't think of things that I could put on a list. My kids, friends, and other family members had no problem getting me presents. I have a rock collection (found, not bought), a $12 and under ring collection, a Day of the Dead figures collection. I love when people make me playlists for my iPod. And I love plants for my garden. In other words, after 30 years, it shouldn't have been hard for him to think of something ALL BY HIMSELF! And he truly was angry, probably more at himself, for his own lack of competence and imagination. What he really wanted was for me to give him a specific product, like a camera lens, a new printer, a kitchen appliance, etc., that he could order online. So, I thought I would toss this complaint out there to compete for "lamest reason for divorce." For more information on my divorce, etc., I have begun working on a blog, complete with videos and images, that I am working on uploading as I write. http://whatwontpilartell.blogspot.com/

How's This For Holiday Spirit?

Jennifer Bailey — Mon, 24 Dec 2007 14:00:00 -0500

Not a lot leaves me speechless, but this one's got me almost silent. A woman recently wrote in to an advice column stating she was considering divorcing her husband because he had not bought her what she wanted for Christmas 12 years in a row. Signed "Mrs. Scrooge", she says that her husband is successful and they are doing fine financially, but she is sick and tired of being disappointed year after year. No other reason for divorce was given in her letter.

There are so many situations that cry out for divorce, it's hard to know where to begin. Lost affection, physical or verbal abuse, or just plain growing apart are all common and acceptable reason to split up with your spouse. But not getting what you wanted for Christmas? I just can't believe this. And what I really can't believe is that this has apparently been going on for 12 years!

Lack of communication seems to be an obvious issue here if she has been disappointed each year at Christmas for 12 years and has not yet spoken to Mr. Scrooge about this. Apparently friends of Mrs. Scrooge support her decision for divorce, but you have to wonder what do they all think is going to happen? Let's assume she asks for and receives her divorce. The next time she meets someone her inability to communicate is going to be a problem all over again. Perhaps she would be better off seeking counselling and learning how to deal with her problems rather than just sitting back and waiting for the other party to figure it out.

Issues regarding the true meaning of Christmas aside, I think Mrs. Scrooge is going to have to deal with her own problems first before she will ever be able to make a marriage work. Either that or let's hope this was some kind of Christmas prank.

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Gifts/Divorce--more info: https://whatwontpilartell.blogspot.com/

How's This For Holiday Spirit?