Though tentative about commencing a trial separation from Rob, I recently undertook an apartment search. After finally graduating from browsing listings to meeting potential apartment-mates on-site, I hit a wall: Apparently thirty-something women leaving a troubled marriage are not considered great apartment-mate material.

This was a terrible eye-opener about the stigma I might have to face down the road, but given my uncertainty about leaving Rob, it was kind of nice that the next step — and whether or not to take it — was out of my control.

How convenient to avoid an inner struggle over whether it's time to leave or not — let someone else provide the answer!

Yesterday, however, some nice women in an adorable apartment nearby decided I'm a "good fit." They didn't pry far into my current living situation or personal life, and so the fact that I'd be in the middle of a separation isn't exactly on the table. But their age and respectful reserve make me think they wouldn't unfairly judge my ability to be a roommate with a year's lease by my unsuccessful attempt to choose a life partner.

Now it seems I have to similarly convince the building management company. No doubt much will be revealed about my situation in the "extremely thorough background check" I've been told to expect. Scary. But also a relief: This means I'm still not exactly in control of taking the next step. I guess I'm not quite ready to take the wheel.